This was me today.
First of all, I despise Wal Mart, but as I mentioned, we were spending some birthday money, and Jack had heard one of the DS games he wanted was at Wal Mart. Plus, I saw they had plastic pools, and wanted one. It was 95 degrees out after all. So, we find the most ginormous plastic pool they carry, and I carry it ALL THE WAY ACROSS the Super Wal Mart to the checkout, kids in tow. Did I mention it was 95 degrees? Did I mention I had to CARRY IT all the way across a SUPER WAL MART? Did anyone offer to help me? No. Did I get stared at a whole lot? And does Rachel like to have people staring at her? When she is carrying a large plastic swimming pool and herding kids? Is this not a recipe for a complete sweatfest?? Indeed.
So, being born with spatial and depth perception lack-itis, I load the kids up and drive up to the entrance to load the ginormous pool into the back of the van. Was there any chance this pool would fit? Absolutely not. Were more people staring at me wondering how I thought I would fit the pool that was about 4 foot too wide, into my van? Surely. Drive to parking spot, and unload kids again. Post candy bar just consumed in car. 95 degrees. You get it. Walk back into store. Adjust pool from one hand to the other in lobby of Wal Mart, hit woman just walking in with pool. I only know this because I heard a thump. I can't see anything. Yell "Oh, I'm sorry!" from behind pool. Woman hisses and rushes off. She probably was shaking her head too, I don't know. I couldn't see anything. Wal Mart greeter is yelling "Are you sure you can get that alone?" I ignore her and keep walking. Return ginormous pool that I just bought, buy medium size pool. Reload kids. This time drive around to garden center area to load pool directly into van. Load pool. Have employee staring down the sweaty deranged looking woman who just pulled up and loaded a pool into her van that she surely mustn’t have paid for. The nerve. Saw face of said woman and decided not to ask any questions.
Home again, home again, jiggedy jig.
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Hahahahahaha...I'm laughing so hard I can barely type!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteOnly you, Raquelita! Only you!
ReplyDeleteI love the title of this post the most! :)
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