A post by Jack

here is my grompa he is 67 yers old i talk to him on the phone alot i love him so much.

Resolution Road

I made a few resolutions this year, a few of which are still going pretty well I might add as we wrap up February.

1) Be healthier by eating with a focus, and exercising 3x week.

This is still working. Although I haven't lost gobs of weight yet, I at least feel more in control of food vs. the food controlling me (see post from early January). I have a plan that I have been sticking to, and it seems to be working. It is amazing to me how much this then channels into the rest of your life. If you feel in control of the food, you then feel in control of everything else. Funny how that works! When I try to stick with just one plan, say South Beach, or Weight Watchers, you seem to only want what you can't have, so I have found by mixing it up each week, those cravings don't get the best of me. It's sort of like Girl Scout cookies. I mean, are they really that amazing, or is it just because you can't get them most of the time? No disrespect to the girls in green saches, but seriously, the hype surrounding Girl Scout cookies befuddles me. They are hard, they are small, and what, do you get about 3 in a box for about $8.75 nowadays? But, I digress...

2) Spend more real time with the kids--goal: minimum of a 1/2 hour each day with each child actually playing.

Sometimes you realize you are around the kids all day, but you are not really spending any time with them. While I can't say I do this every day, I am conscious of it all the time, and find when I actually do this, I feel much more connected with them. It sounds pretty pathetic that there are days you don't spend even half an hour of focused time with the kids, but if you start paying attention you might realize you have days like this too.

3) Spend more time with God.

This is the one I am still struggling with. Currently, I attempt to pray after I crawl in bed which doesn't go far before I fall asleep. I would like to try a set time of day where I read a devotional, the bible, or just pray, but I haven't seemed to have gotten there yet. This is especially frustrating now that we are in the season of Lent, yet I still haven't found my motivation. I am not sure what the hangup is, but I haven't felt this disconnected in quite some time. Thankfully our God is a forgiving God who waits patiently while we refind our mojo that we have lost. Any suggestions here are welcome from anyone else who has gone through this!

On a related note, I am reading Life of Pi. I took it on vacation, but just couldn't seem to get a good bite out of it so it's been a slow read for me so far. I did, however, come upon this passage which I really liked and it made me think. The author was discussing the difference between agnostics and aetheists, and says,

"Doubt is useful for a while. We must all pass through the garden of Gethsemane. If Christ played with doubt, so must we. If Christ spent an anguished night in prayer, if He burst out from the Cross, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?", then surely we are also permitted doubt. But we must move on. To choose doubt as a philosophy of life is akin to choosing immobility as a means of transportation."

Re-entry

Despite the aforementioned gracious welcome I received upon returning home, I am still having a bit of trouble with re-entry. I have a case of the otherwise-known-as-post-vacation-hangover as my friend Allie likes to call it (who, by the way, is super cool enough to know how to do music on her blog.. that wouldn't work so well for me since I haven't listened to a new song since about 1982, so I love to listen to her blog and hear songs I've never heard before!)

Day 1:

Tuesday I saw everything in a haze through my three hours of sleep eyes, but after taking a long nap while Luke napped, things cleared up a little bit. I was not, however, at all productive. Rob called to say he was coming home and I mentioned that he really shouldn't expect much from me. To gauge how serious the situation was, he asked if Luke was dressed, to which I gave a resounding no. Ooh, this is serious. Should I pick up something to eat, he asks? No, I can pull off spaghetti and meatballs, I say. Lest you think I just redeemed myself, we are talking frozen meatballs and jarred sauce, but still, it felt like we were on the uphill track.

Day 2:

Wednesday fared slightly better. I actually unpacked a few things out of my suitcase, and Luke was dressed by noon. I was still not inspired to either eat healthy or cook anything/clean it up. It is amazing how quickly you can get spoiled eating out! Jack had a day off from school, so while Luke went to preschool, we had a lunch date, followed by a library outing. I love spending time one on one with the kids.

Jack took these with his camera on our lunch date

Day 3:
Today things were almost normal. I finished unpacking the suitcase, made a nice dinner, and caught up on the laundry. Luke escorted me to the always dreaded annual doctor appointment, and that actually turned out alright, despite the Leapster I brought to keep him busy having dead batteries, the snack I brought to keep him busy getting dumped on the floor (GROSS! NO! DO NOT EAT THAT OFF THE FLOOR!), the Tootsie pop sucker backup "only pull this out if I get desperate" then being dropped on the floor right after it was opened, followed by crying, followed up by the doctor seeing if she could find him something else but alas, the sucker she found had a pink wrapper so for Luke that is a deal breaker. I mean seriously, where does this come from? We are the people who bought a kitchen and had a purple play stroller despite having boys. I try really hard not to differentiate between girl and boy toys, colors, interests, etc. so where he got this girl/boy thing I don't know, but it is serious. I mean serious, people. You wouldn't believe how many conversations sound like, "Can a girl wear green?", or, "I liked all the trucks in that book but Gabrielle, the one with the girl name", or, "I don't want a girl plate". One notable exception to this rule is Dora. Maybe it's her wacky fashion sense, maybe it's her wild love of adventure, maybe it's because she sort of shouts when she talks, I don't know, but Dora is cool in Luke's book.

And yes, he is drinking that bathwater. While we have made considerable progress in this arena, as a baby and toddler, I can say unabashedly that this was his primary source of daily fluid consumption. They say pick your battles, right?

The trip to Florida

After months of anticipation, the long weekend trip to Florida has finally come, and, sadly, gone. We left last Friday morning, and I got home very late Monday night. (2:30 a.m.; so technically, Tuesday morning). It was so nice to get away from it all, and just do whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted, on your own schedule. Though the weather wasn't all that warm, we braved the temps like any good midwesterner would. While locals walked around with their pants and jackets, we lay in those beach chairs with teeth-a-chatterin' and goosebumps the size of groundmoles in our vain attempts to leave with a bit of color and possibly a faint tan line somewhere on our bodies. Vacations are the only time where $5 beers and $8-10 fruity drinks seem like a perfectly acceptable price to pay. $23.95 for a pound of fudge? Of course, give me two pounds! In the end, it is all worth it and you never regret what you said yes to, even if it means three weeks to take off what you gained in those few short days. And of course, thanks to our families and friends, and especially husbands, who took days off and made sacrifices to help make this happen for us.

This next set of pictures requires a small disclaimer. You know how things that are actually really silly and juvenile can seem so much funnier after you've had a few drinks? That is sort of how these happened. I am not sure who started it (mom), but somehow once one was done we knew we all needed to take a picture with some variation of the bird. So, here you go...

While the trip was a wonderful break from reality, I was able to come home to a very clean house and a family who claimed to have missed me terribly. I even got these from my husband:

WOW! Who gets to leave for a long weekend away and then come home to flowers from your husband welcoming you back? I have a keeper!

I got an equally sweet treat when I checked on the boys after getting home late Monday night. I covered Luke up and kissed his cheek, and when I did, he opened his eyes, smiled and said, "Mommy!", and then closed them again and snuggled deep into his blankets. You couldn't ask for more than that.

Don't underestimate four year olds alone

*Luke really wanted to play outside Monday, so I suited him up and sent him out. This project kept him quite busy apparently:

And yes, it is like this ALL around the van. Amazing the artistic ways you can use all of that dirty slush that accumulates under your vehicle in the winter! It's funny to watch people's faces as they stare at me driving this around and trying to calculate what kind of animal might have crawled across my vehicle. Well, it was this kind, people!

*When I tell Luke I love him, he says "My green heart loves you". He's convinced that his heart is green. Of course; why would his be red like everyone else's? Doesn't fit his character!
*Ash Wednesday was today so I did my best to try to explain the season of Lent and what it means. These things are harder to explain than you'd think! But Jack was definitely interested in the ashes involved in the service, while Luke fell asleep during church. Perfect, I was able to focus tonight. Yea!
*Pediatric dentist checkup-attempt #2 is tomorrow morning with Luke. Wish me luck! Lots of bribery and preparation have been involved this time. Hope it works. More on that soon...
*Finally turned page 1,071 and finished my monster book last night, Under the Dome. I wanted to get it done so I could work on my next book club book, Life of Pi. I checked it out today at the library so it's all set to hang out on the beach with me very soon. Whoopee!

A trip to Illinois

This past weekend, we drove to the western suburbs of Illinois to visit some dear friends who we've known for about 15 years now. Chris and Rob met while both working for Aldi way back when, and we all hit it off instantly. It was a super enjoyable and relaxing weekend. We've often stopped through on the way to Wisconsin for a quick visit, but haven't had a full weekend just to hang out and enjoy each other's company in quite a while so it was great to talk, laugh, and catch up. The kids enjoyed a visit at the Kid's Casino (a.k.a. Chuck E. Cheese's):

and the adults enjoyed lots of sitting around and laughing. We always can't help but bring up their shower, which is otherwise used as a government torture instrument due to the high intensity needles which shoot out from the showerhead, and Rob couldn't resist throwing in a jab and asking if they were preparing to hang meat as we sat around bundled in fleece blankets and slippers. This, of course, is never an issue for Cindy, who is the hardest working most go-getter gal I have ever encountered, so naturally, she is never sitting still enough to acquire the icicles hanging from her nose hairs that we did. If I moved as much as she did I would never be cold either!

Despite our kids being very overtired, we had a great time, and I was again reminded of just how blessed we are to have so many wonderful friendships in our lives. We love you guys!

Snow days

I can honestly say I am not sick of the winter yet, despite the most recent wave of 6-10" of snow that's come our way. I am, however, sick of snow days. We've had 7 so far— not the most you've ever heard of I'm sure, but enough to lose the novelty. That's not counting all of the early dismissals and two hour delays. Now, make no mistake— I love my children fiercely and we often have really great days together. However, I think I build up these snow days with too high of expectations. Oh, I think, we'll have such a nice day cozying around a fire (which I can rarely successfully build), baking cookies together (which I rarely have all the ingredients for), and playing games together (which no one can ever agree on which game to play). Visions of gumdrops and lollipops dance through my head, yet somehow the day ends up tasting more like black licorice and brussel sprouts. Mysteriously, that announcement of "School is cancelled!" seems to press the ignitor button for "Great! Let's fight Luke! Nonstop, all day!! Sound fun?" Cuz these boys like to fight. A lot. I'm not talkin' throwing punches fighting, just more like, "Luke, let's do XYZ!" "No, I want to do Q!" "Ok, I'm not playing with you then." Ensue lots of screeching and begging, followed by more screeching.


So, while we do have some fun moments:

Aw c'mon Mom, look how cute we are! See, we can get along sometimes!

Snow fun with the neighbors today

We also have a lot of trying times, ending the day with my feeling frustrated and ineffective, let alone full of questions surrounding what I accomplished today besides trying incredibly hard to maintain the status quo housework wise and not yell too much.

On a sidenote, after Rob got home, from his own and completely different trying day at work, I retreated to the basement to try the highly touted 30 Day Shred video by Jillian Michaels of The Biggest Loser. I can no longer walk upright. My legs have turned to complete jello and have no strength left in them. And I only did the Phase 1 20 minute workout. Following the "easy" chick in the background instead of the more "advanced" chic. Ouch.

Oh wait, my cell phone just chirped, I have a new text, lemme just check it quick.

Oh, I see. A two hour delay tomorrow? Mmm hmm, of course. Perfect.

Sigh.

Random bits

I was so proud of these snowmen last winter

Doesn't this just look like Rob and I?

I have a few random thoughts floating around to share, none of which command a post dedicated to themselves:

*I went swimsuit shopping yesterday for my upcoming long weekend in Florida with my mom, sister and sister-in-law. It was brutal. Brutal. I'm sure I looked like a woman walking to her execution as I entered that mall. You are able to sort of convince yourself that it's not that bad, surely you will find something that looks ok, and then bam, the reality of those dressing room lights and three way mirrors hits you and you have to reevaluate those thoughts. I walked away with two suits that if I am required to force my body into I can, but it ain't gonna be pretty.

*Rob and I got a babysitter last night to go to Luke's preschool conference and then to a local bar in our town for a drink. You know you live in a small town when:

1) You ask, "Do you have wine?" and he answers, "Chardonnay. In a box." Alrighty, then! I'll have a Miller Lite!

2) They serve their drinks out of a regular refrigerator.

3) There is a seating area with a TV and old couches grouped together when you walk in that remind you exactly of your best friends basement when you were in junior high.

4) You pay to sign up for a square on the football scorecard for the Super Bowl and you only write your name. When you ask if there's a place to put a phone number too, the bartender says, hey, small town. Most people just stop by to see if they won.

*I'm beginning to think the Wii is the devil's helpmate. Sure, it's great if you are trying to get something done and the kids can just go play the Wii, but somehow, it has infiltrated Jack's brain to give him complete amnesia of his memories doing anything else but play the Wii. "Mom, I know you think all I think about is the Wii, but I just don't know what else to do right now but play the Wii!!" Hmm, you USED to know what to do with yourself before we had the Wii but those memories have now mysteriously been erased from your brain!

*Eating a low-fat 50 calorie mini fudgesicle with Luke:

"Mom, will this make my belly fat?"

"No, it won't."

"Will it make your belly fat?"

"No, it won't."

"Well then, why is your belly fat?"

"Because I eat too much."

"Will your belly always be that fat?"

"I sure hope not."

My girls

Why were pyramids just so damn cool back then?

At an IU football game

Going to Keeneland horse race in Lexington

The 8 of us who hung out throughout college

This past weekend I was fortunate enough to be able to spend two days with my two best friends. These are girls who I have known half my life-we met freshman year at IU when we were 18 years old, so I literally feel that we have grown up together. We have seen each other through breakups, heartache, hangovers, marriages and the births of our combined nine children. There is nothing like knowing you can bare your innermost feelings and know you will not be judged but will still be loved the way you always have been. I feel so truly blessed to have you in my lives and I thank you for your friendship!

Just for fun, I have posted some pictures of us "before" and "after". The earliest picture I could find that included us all was freshman year in our dorm. We were all dressed up to go through Rush for sororities but were so thankful later that none of us made the cut so we could then live together the next 3 years of college. We had more fun than is legal in college and I wouldn't trade a second of it. The next two pictures are Claudine and I at a football game, and Andrea and I dressed up to head to Keeneland horse race in Lexington, Kentucky. Now mind you, I was still driving my first car then, which was an '82 Plymouth that I had promised when I received it in high school I would not drive more than 20 minutes away. That sucker transported me all over the country during college, but that's a story for another day. Then, there is a group picture from our sophomore year. Now, let's play a game. What do you think was super popular in 1992? You got it folks, spiral perms and bodysuits. You know, those bodysuits you snapped on like a onesie to show your svelte beer and pizza figure? So this picture epitomizes the height of those trends. And to all of my youngster blog readers, those cups were full of water. Water. Gotta stay hydrated.

I close the post with a few "after" pictures, one taken last summer and the other just this past weekend. We pledged years ago that we would get together at least 3 times a year, and since we are in Iowa, Michigan, and Indiana, that is sometimes easier said than done, but we make it happen. I drove away from this weekend feeling completely filled up, and so blessed to have such longstanding friendships. And, of course, a thanks to my hubby who realizes how important my friendships are to me and will help me make that happen. Go IU!